days

so this is how it's feeling to be wishing you were here yet a million miles away. all i really care about is you being absent of beautiful faces and outstanding bodies that crave the slow feeling of how great it is to be fucking you. i can't figure out if i want you to stay away from them or them to stay away from you, but one thing is for certain, my lack of feeling for myself is making me nervous. and the past two days have been walking a highwire across razor blades barefooted and praying i won't fall. it's getting to be too much for me, the anger, the passion, the paranoia, and the fear. i've got far less than few hours before i'm put to work again, and i missing what it is to be with you again. through the events that will come to be called the great flood of 2006, and the black light pornos of bowling alleys and cigarettes, i've begun to want you all for myself in the worst of obsessive ways. waiting to hear that sweet tune screaming out to me and the sound of your beautiful soul mixing up the night and calling my name writing how much you love me across the stars and in my heart and making me bleed with repenting anticipation for tomorrow when you'll be in my arms, because i'm not even mad at you just the world and the booze in my veins, along with all the people in it. i hope you'll still

need/want/have/hold/trust/love/crave/believe/feel/own/fuck/be with me...tomorrow.