"i heard from someone you're still pretty"

the smoke stack in porter spews out blackness into the air like some kind of holocaustic crematorium, last week it snowed and now two days from december it feels like mid-september... i don't know what the hell is wrong with this weather. it's like your affection, waxed fuller than the moon and then disappearing, coming on in waves. i'm finding myself quietly amused with the short comings of a very perticular kind of vile and unlikeable soul who, for all intensive and non-bodily functions, is utterly blind to the true concept of a heart. i know now that i'm not as weak as you (or i) care to think.

and i know how you like to talk a big game... but you're not too good at playing it.

in fact i think i got you beat.

and by the way... i am very happy here with my complications. because i love him.

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the playlist and for whom

1.guster- medicine for maggie
2.the spill canvas- self conclusion for the suicidal
3.the used- all that i've got for the "first"
4.something corporate- konstantine for why i go back
5.my chemical romance- black parade for those i've lost
6.aarctika- aura lee for joshua
7.iron and wine- the trapeze swinger for the one's i've left behind
8.matthew good- near fantastica for me