i wanna fall in love tonight

some time in the very near future i want to bare my soul. i want to show you who i'm becoming. i want you to see what my life is making me. i want to give away my deepest thoughts. i want to let go of the past. some time in the very near future i want to show you how much i love you.



i can't wait to have my own place to come home to. these dorm room walls aren't doing it for me anymore. i want some place that will be home, not just a room i sleep in. i see myself coming in and living in my space, wearing what i want, saying what i want, doing as i please, and living my own life. then i see the one thing that's missing. someone to love. someone to give my heart to. granted that act has hurt me before, but i think someone would love my heart, and i think i deserve that. i deserve to let "him" know that i won't stray, i will give all, i won't turn my back, i wont push, and i won't distrust or second guess. "he" will be happy; i will make it so. i would be sincere, truthful, and attentive. i will repay love with love and kindness with a caring and thoughtfulness few can offer. some of you know what i'm talking about. he'll be lucky. he'll be loved. i can be good for someone. i can be everything they've ever wanted. i just need the chance.

i'm longing tonight. pining. over lovers more fortunate than i. seeing those around me... healthy, happy, in love. feeling that i won't ever be good enough to be that for someone. but i know, in my deepest soul, i will make someone very happy some day.

goodnight and signing off......